I've been away from college for 6 days now and i'm trying hard to get myself into remission. I have got a tiny bit more strength, i think. I'm sleeping more.

This morning i did yoga for the first time in months. It made me feel bad, but good. Good bad. I'm starting to feel wierd now though. The other day, i went back to my field. It's my favourite place. I hadn't been there for 6 months. It's beautiful :) I used to love walking. I wish i could still do it without feeling so bad. I love the sun, but it doesn't like me. When i'm walking in the sun it makes everything feel fuzzier and strange. It's like my eyes can't cope with it.

On friday, i'm going back to the doctors to try and get a referral to a clinic in London. Maybe there, i will finally get the support i should have been given years ago. I've heard good things about it. This could be really good for me. I think i need it.

I am stressed, again. I wish i could just let it all go...